i close my eyes, and the flashback starts.

i can't stop thinking about blogging.
i missed everyone so much. but i'm not coming out yet..
i'm not sure if anyone's taking me back.

so where was i, for the past months?
i've been a zombie. trying to figure out what i want to do with my life. one day, our teacher told us that we should study real hard and get used to much, much, more stress-college.
so then i realized, why? why should i study? what's the point? what do i want to do with my life? how do i see myself 10 years from now? i was horrified. people around me talk about what they want to be when they grow up and everything. as for me, i just sit there. thinking.. thinking of what's next. i thought i'd just let nature take it's course or something..but i got nothing. i have no clue what i want. and that sucks.
school was err, whatever. i got four line of 8's. but that's okay. i got wayy higher in araling panlipunan and my homeroom totally took me by surprise. i strived, and strived, and then the questions haunt me once more. i can't just ignore them.
no boylets/love life. i thought i was gonna have a hard time from keeping girls from stealing edward from me in school, but i didn't. they didn't like him very much. not just him, but the whole movie. but i don't blame them. i think, as other twilighteers do, that the movie was crap. i expected so much and got so little. but that's okay. it's edward anthony masen cullen that i love, not edward rpattz cullen.
prom. prom is just 2 months away and i can't think of anything to wear. why, oh why, did we have to have a fairy-tale themed prom?! argh. HELP!
cj is my partner. he's a pretty good friend, and we're pretty comfortable with each other so we're bound to enjoy prom. that is, if i have a dress.
the tezza thing is going pretty awesome. nobody in class likes her anymore and someone caught her making out with daniel in the uber-stinky boys' bathroom. she used to be so defensive and angry at me cause i badmouth her ALL THE TIME, but i can't help it if 95% of what i say is true. i only exaggerate about the part where i think she's half a virgin. xDD but now she's all "please give us a chance blah, blah"
so uhhm.. i might post some more tomorrow. i have to go now cause we're going to dawn mass tomorrow and we're having our christmas party. i still don't know who picked me..it's driving me crazy! ;D